It is said that growing up is the realization that there is no one out there for you. You are alone right from the beginning for ever. Everything that begins is with you only to end with you. Luckily, this truth dawns on most of us in bits and pieces. But if it happens through one big tragedy, life will be a trauma.
I have friends, quite many of them, both in real time and on Internet. I correspond with them. Quite a few of them quickly shift on a platform of exchanging personal matters, sometimes most guarded secrets of life. And in this matter of discussing personal matters, at least some of us, do it without hesitation with remote Internet friends than the real time ones. Strange though, it is truth. Why do we do this? Each of us is in eternal loneliness and we illusion that by sharing our innermost feelings with someone we ward off our loneliness. And when it has failed with known friends, we try with unknown and remote ones. Is it not so? But that loneliness promptly returns like homing birds and the nights, as usual, are long.
There are many people for whom a day is not complete if they do not chat on messenger with somebody. For them life is a bore without a message a day. For some, it is gossip and for some other it is a TV serial. We have invented millions of ways not to be bored; if it is business for you, it is on-line share trading for me. If it is keen interest in tennis and such other sports and games for you, it is spiritual, intellectual or science magazine reading for me. The funny thing is, the very method you adopt to get away from your boredom, could well be boring for me! While tennis is just a boring toss of a ball for me, you could be sacrificing your good nights sleep watching American Open on the TV.
If I do not solve at least one SU DO KU puzzle every day, I feel something amiss. A friend of mine goes to the nearby park where half a dozen senior people gather in the evenings to play chess. While two of them play, others take sides to make back room suggestions for the moves. For them the day does not pass without a game of chess.
We indulge in a lot of circus to get away from boredom, don't we?
What is boredom? Is that not a form of being alone? Is there a permanent solution to this problem of boredom? We have invented many things to counter our boredom, but boredom returns with vengeance. In fact, indulging in these so called solutions to our problem of boredom, many a time it turns out to be an addiction posing a new problem; is it not so?
So what is the real solution to our boredom? I think it is in realizing the eternal fact that we are all alone within. By turning inward and seeing deep inside us, gives the real solution to not only our problem of boredom but all our problems. That, in my opinion, is everlasting bliss; nothing outside me can give me this bliss.
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Monday, August 9, 2010
Hinduism - Is It A Religion?
It made an amusing reading yesterday, the news of Julia Roberts announcing 'I am a practicing Hindu'. The news read - "Julia Roberts has converted to Hinduism in the hope of having a peaceful life in her next incarnation and the Hollywood superstar regularly visits temples with her family to 'chant, pray and celebrate'..."
The basic question one should ask is - What is Hinduism? Is it a way of life, a sect a race or a religion? And if it is not a religion, is not converting to Hinduism an absurdity? Religions, of course, are framed in rigid sets of codes of conduct. The very basis of a religion is disciplining a society in the hope of establishing an everlasting peaceful co-existence. Hence each religion is defined by its particular set of code, its beliefs and an assurance of good life in the next incarnation or a place in heaven, for the devout followers. Does Hinduism dictate any code of conduct to its followers? Does Hinduism demand following in the first place? Is Hinduism an expansionist organization? Is it a race?
Many learned thinkers have opined that Hinduism is not a religion but a way of life which has to change in accordance with changing times and circumstances. That is why they vigorously argue that Hinduism is the most vibrant way of living. Many say that Hinduism gives total freedom to question all and sundry teachings including the Upanishads, which incidentally is universally agreed upon by top level spiritual thinkers as the core essence of Hinduism. Hinduism does not promote blind following, does not dictate terms for living. They argue, it is the influence of various religions that make people blindly follow certain Hindu beliefs without questioning their veracity, making Hinduism yet another religion. In fact, true Hinduism has a place for atheism too. Hinduism offers an atheist to argue his case with the very rationalism he believes in. The Upanishads say, - do not accept God just because your teacher says so; discover God yourself.
When such is the case with Hinduism, where comes the question of conversion? When true Hinduism suggests discovering without blind following, every born human being is a Hindu. The beliefs come later as dictated by the prevailing society. Hinduism begins in nothingness, giving every opportunity in every split moment to realise life. Perhaps that is why the scriptural sayings like "Vasudhaiva Kutumbakam (The whole world is one family)" and "Dharmam chara; satyam vada (Dharma the way of living - Hinduism , is moving, vibrant; truth is stationary, permanent)"
Coming back to Julia Roberts, an accomplished actor highly capable of doing any movie role with great ability to depict the character very successfully, adapting to a given role is just like changing frocks to her. And it is so very natural for her to think that "practicing" religions is also a matter of adaptability. But Hinduism is not practice; does not offer you any rewards for your devout following or practicing and above all Hinduism is the only way of living in this world allows one the courage to question the belief of reincarnation and Karma.
At the end of the news column, one Trupti Patel of Hindu Forum of Britain aptly said "If Julia Roberts wants to call herself a Hindu, we welcome her into our Dharma and hope that she can be helpful in various charitable causes for the education and betterment of Hindus around the world....." The HFB also hopes that it not just a cheap publicity stunt. (Julia's upcoming film Eat Pray Love is recently shot in India) Quite possible in today's world briskly selling "Yoga" and "Kundalini" in the lucrative spiritual market.
Also visit my other site at: http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Damodar_Bhandarkar
The basic question one should ask is - What is Hinduism? Is it a way of life, a sect a race or a religion? And if it is not a religion, is not converting to Hinduism an absurdity? Religions, of course, are framed in rigid sets of codes of conduct. The very basis of a religion is disciplining a society in the hope of establishing an everlasting peaceful co-existence. Hence each religion is defined by its particular set of code, its beliefs and an assurance of good life in the next incarnation or a place in heaven, for the devout followers. Does Hinduism dictate any code of conduct to its followers? Does Hinduism demand following in the first place? Is Hinduism an expansionist organization? Is it a race?
Many learned thinkers have opined that Hinduism is not a religion but a way of life which has to change in accordance with changing times and circumstances. That is why they vigorously argue that Hinduism is the most vibrant way of living. Many say that Hinduism gives total freedom to question all and sundry teachings including the Upanishads, which incidentally is universally agreed upon by top level spiritual thinkers as the core essence of Hinduism. Hinduism does not promote blind following, does not dictate terms for living. They argue, it is the influence of various religions that make people blindly follow certain Hindu beliefs without questioning their veracity, making Hinduism yet another religion. In fact, true Hinduism has a place for atheism too. Hinduism offers an atheist to argue his case with the very rationalism he believes in. The Upanishads say, - do not accept God just because your teacher says so; discover God yourself.
When such is the case with Hinduism, where comes the question of conversion? When true Hinduism suggests discovering without blind following, every born human being is a Hindu. The beliefs come later as dictated by the prevailing society. Hinduism begins in nothingness, giving every opportunity in every split moment to realise life. Perhaps that is why the scriptural sayings like "Vasudhaiva Kutumbakam (The whole world is one family)" and "Dharmam chara; satyam vada (Dharma the way of living - Hinduism , is moving, vibrant; truth is stationary, permanent)"
Coming back to Julia Roberts, an accomplished actor highly capable of doing any movie role with great ability to depict the character very successfully, adapting to a given role is just like changing frocks to her. And it is so very natural for her to think that "practicing" religions is also a matter of adaptability. But Hinduism is not practice; does not offer you any rewards for your devout following or practicing and above all Hinduism is the only way of living in this world allows one the courage to question the belief of reincarnation and Karma.
At the end of the news column, one Trupti Patel of Hindu Forum of Britain aptly said "If Julia Roberts wants to call herself a Hindu, we welcome her into our Dharma and hope that she can be helpful in various charitable causes for the education and betterment of Hindus around the world....." The HFB also hopes that it not just a cheap publicity stunt. (Julia's upcoming film Eat Pray Love is recently shot in India) Quite possible in today's world briskly selling "Yoga" and "Kundalini" in the lucrative spiritual market.
Also visit my other site at: http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Damodar_Bhandarkar
Sunday, August 8, 2010
Taste Of The Mango 'Saatt'
I don't want to rake up much of the sweet nostalgic memories. But the taste of 'Saatt',- dried mango pulp, is known only to those who have tasted it sitting curled up at a corner of the house, looking and listening to the torrential monsoon rains, in a small town in South Kanara.
45 years is really a long period of time, since I migrated from my native South Kanara, now renamed as Dakshina Kannada in line with linguist chauvinism. I was born and brought up in a small town called Panemangalore near Mangalore (now Mangaluru!). My primary schooling was in the sleeping small town itself but for secondary school education I had to walk a couple of miles to neighboring Bantwal, another town, a little bigger at that. Both the towns were situated on the opposite banks of river Nethravathi and there was a steel bridge built in 1914 by the British. There were only a couple of dozen pupils from my town and neighboring villages walking daily to have 'higher' education!
A word about the bridge and the monsoon rains needs a mention here. I don't know why the British selected the particular location where the river bank is almost the widest, to construct the bridge when there were narrower places, not so far away. The bridge, still in good condition though for restricted use, is having about 15 spans of about 100 feet length each. My memory is not that sharp to say the correct statistics, yet the bridge was known to be the longest in the vicinity next only to Ullal Railway bridge at Mangalore on the same river just before joining the Arabian sea. The spans are supported on stone and cement pillars. The sand bed of the river could be seen in summers at about 30 feet deep from the bridge. Today the bottom cannot be seen because of the dam constructed a few hundred meters away on the flowing direction from the bridge site. There are also two new bridges, one each for rail and road traffic on either side of the old bridge.
Academic year started with roaring monsoon rains simultaneously every time. Tropic monsoon rains those days was a terrifying experience with thunder, storms and lightning. If we boys and very few girls while going to or coming from the school, were caught by these stormy, heavy down pours in the middle of the bridge, a fully open area for cross winds, we all would simply shut our umbrellas and squat firmly on the road close to each other so that none of us was washed away into the river! There is strong steel structural parapet on both sides of the bridge, but at the pillars it was only some 3 or 4 parallel steel tubes, through which it is easy to be swept away!(Our juvenile fears). Also there are gaps in the steel parapet structure design, enough for school going children to pass through. When there were good continuous rains, the water level in the river rose rapidly and came up to almost 4 feet below the bridge flowing with fierce speed. The bridge is on the highest level compared to the dwellings in the surrounding area. Floods sweeping tenements in low lying areas was quite common in monsoon season. After the construction of this bridge, since 1914 the water level of the river never came above the bridge (look at the British foresight!). Yet there were two occasions when both Panemangalore and Bantwal were completely submerged under floods. Once in 1923 before I was born and again in 1974 when I had already migrated. Normally, the water levels rose and fell quite often during monsoons for about 45 days. A number of times we used to cross floods submerging parts of our road to Bantwal up to 4 feet, which was quite normal when the water of the river was below danger level. Today all the roads are heightened and the danger level is significantly risen up. Above all, I don't think the monsoon rains are as much today as it was in those days. In those days, a piece of 'saatt' in the half pant pocket would always come in handy!
South Kanara is home for a number of varieties of mangoes. There are at least a couple of dozens of wild varieties, both sweet and sour. If they are sweet, why then they are called wild?- you may wonder. For one, they have big stone (seed) with full of veins (called beard or coir in local parlance). Quite a few wild varieties are used in making good pickles from tender to different stages of maturity. Also there are a few varieties from which curries are made. For this also mangoes, though are wild, they are special because you cannot make curries from all wild varies; more the vein and juicy pulp with equal sweetness and sour is better. Saatt is made from almost all wild varieties, yet fleshy pulp is preferred. All these special wild varieties were plucked at right level of maturity for different kind of usages, sorted, brought and sold from door to door by tribal people dwelling by the forests, during my times. The fruit was available in abundance in those good old days. Today this practice is totally out.
Mango is considered as the king of fruits in the region. Out of a large variety of 'Kasi' (grafted) mangoes, 'Mundappa' variety is considered the king of mangoes during those days in South Kanara. There are other kasi varieties too such as Pairi (Raspuri), Malgoa, Apus (Alphonso) Kalappadi etc., which are not only very sweet but also have thick pulp with rich flavour, very small stone and almost no veins. Tart is made from a selected kasi varieties such as Mundappa. To make tart, mango should be fully mature but not ripe. It is a pity that the present generation has no access to such wide and mouth watering preparations of mango except perhaps those in deep rural (?) areas of Konkan, Goa, North and South Kanara. And that is why I said in the beginning, to have the taste one should practically taste under the same circumstances, - heavy monsoon rains, curled up in a corner preferably under bedsheets and chew the mango Saatt!
Also see my other articles at: http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Damodar_Bhandarkar
45 years is really a long period of time, since I migrated from my native South Kanara, now renamed as Dakshina Kannada in line with linguist chauvinism. I was born and brought up in a small town called Panemangalore near Mangalore (now Mangaluru!). My primary schooling was in the sleeping small town itself but for secondary school education I had to walk a couple of miles to neighboring Bantwal, another town, a little bigger at that. Both the towns were situated on the opposite banks of river Nethravathi and there was a steel bridge built in 1914 by the British. There were only a couple of dozen pupils from my town and neighboring villages walking daily to have 'higher' education!
A word about the bridge and the monsoon rains needs a mention here. I don't know why the British selected the particular location where the river bank is almost the widest, to construct the bridge when there were narrower places, not so far away. The bridge, still in good condition though for restricted use, is having about 15 spans of about 100 feet length each. My memory is not that sharp to say the correct statistics, yet the bridge was known to be the longest in the vicinity next only to Ullal Railway bridge at Mangalore on the same river just before joining the Arabian sea. The spans are supported on stone and cement pillars. The sand bed of the river could be seen in summers at about 30 feet deep from the bridge. Today the bottom cannot be seen because of the dam constructed a few hundred meters away on the flowing direction from the bridge site. There are also two new bridges, one each for rail and road traffic on either side of the old bridge.
Academic year started with roaring monsoon rains simultaneously every time. Tropic monsoon rains those days was a terrifying experience with thunder, storms and lightning. If we boys and very few girls while going to or coming from the school, were caught by these stormy, heavy down pours in the middle of the bridge, a fully open area for cross winds, we all would simply shut our umbrellas and squat firmly on the road close to each other so that none of us was washed away into the river! There is strong steel structural parapet on both sides of the bridge, but at the pillars it was only some 3 or 4 parallel steel tubes, through which it is easy to be swept away!(Our juvenile fears). Also there are gaps in the steel parapet structure design, enough for school going children to pass through. When there were good continuous rains, the water level in the river rose rapidly and came up to almost 4 feet below the bridge flowing with fierce speed. The bridge is on the highest level compared to the dwellings in the surrounding area. Floods sweeping tenements in low lying areas was quite common in monsoon season. After the construction of this bridge, since 1914 the water level of the river never came above the bridge (look at the British foresight!). Yet there were two occasions when both Panemangalore and Bantwal were completely submerged under floods. Once in 1923 before I was born and again in 1974 when I had already migrated. Normally, the water levels rose and fell quite often during monsoons for about 45 days. A number of times we used to cross floods submerging parts of our road to Bantwal up to 4 feet, which was quite normal when the water of the river was below danger level. Today all the roads are heightened and the danger level is significantly risen up. Above all, I don't think the monsoon rains are as much today as it was in those days. In those days, a piece of 'saatt' in the half pant pocket would always come in handy!
South Kanara is home for a number of varieties of mangoes. There are at least a couple of dozens of wild varieties, both sweet and sour. If they are sweet, why then they are called wild?- you may wonder. For one, they have big stone (seed) with full of veins (called beard or coir in local parlance). Quite a few wild varieties are used in making good pickles from tender to different stages of maturity. Also there are a few varieties from which curries are made. For this also mangoes, though are wild, they are special because you cannot make curries from all wild varies; more the vein and juicy pulp with equal sweetness and sour is better. Saatt is made from almost all wild varieties, yet fleshy pulp is preferred. All these special wild varieties were plucked at right level of maturity for different kind of usages, sorted, brought and sold from door to door by tribal people dwelling by the forests, during my times. The fruit was available in abundance in those good old days. Today this practice is totally out.
Mango is considered as the king of fruits in the region. Out of a large variety of 'Kasi' (grafted) mangoes, 'Mundappa' variety is considered the king of mangoes during those days in South Kanara. There are other kasi varieties too such as Pairi (Raspuri), Malgoa, Apus (Alphonso) Kalappadi etc., which are not only very sweet but also have thick pulp with rich flavour, very small stone and almost no veins. Tart is made from a selected kasi varieties such as Mundappa. To make tart, mango should be fully mature but not ripe. It is a pity that the present generation has no access to such wide and mouth watering preparations of mango except perhaps those in deep rural (?) areas of Konkan, Goa, North and South Kanara. And that is why I said in the beginning, to have the taste one should practically taste under the same circumstances, - heavy monsoon rains, curled up in a corner preferably under bedsheets and chew the mango Saatt!
Also see my other articles at: http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Damodar_Bhandarkar
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Our Priorities
"Treat the mind; body will follow" - The first tenet of Ayurveda, the Indian science of life (Medicine)
During my school days my teachers used to say 'Spend half the time in understanding the question before you attempt an answer'. Over the years I have found this principle of approaching problems is very true in real life too. Looking back at my failures, I now see it very clearly that they were simply due to lack of proper understanding of the problem rather than my ability, or lack of it, to tackle them. Most of the times I jumped into conclusions or fell victim to my prejudices and preconceived beliefs.
The case in point I would like to present in this context is the recent utterances of Congress leader Mani Shanker Aiyer, which took everybody by surprise . Congress top brass including the prime minister was rather angry at the utterances. And the media, both print and visual, made a big hue and cry of it. What did Mani say? "Personally, I will be unhappy if the Commonwealth Games are successful," said Aiyar, a nominated Rajya Sabha member. He continued, "I am very happy with the rains, firstly because it will ensure a good agriculture for the country and secondly because it will ensure that the Commonwealth Games are spoilt, if the Commonwealth Games are successful, they will further organise Asian Games and other events... I will be happy if the Games are spoilt," he said.
What nonsense is this maverick speaking? So much pains are being taken by every concerned Govt. and non- Govt. body to make the event a grand success; the works of infrastructure is going on a war footing. Is Aiyer mad or what? I am sure the general line of thinking of great many of us, "proud" Indians is going in this way. Congress Party has not only reprimanded him but also ordered him to shut up and not to talk a word about the Commonwealth Games any more. But that is not the point I am interested in. Aiyer or whoever so, the statement deserves a deeper thought before any kind of reaction.
Is it not a fact that more than 50% of the population of this great nation is struggling to get two square meals a day? A few thousand crores of rupees of tax payer's money is being spent on this event. For whose sake? For what good purpose regarding the upliftment of the society? We do not have proper health services in place leaving the rural poor simply to die or suffer. There are no sufficient primary schools to educate the rural poor. And there are no enough job opportunities for the educated middle and lower class. There are many, a long list, of problems that cry for priority attention than a sports event.
Mani Shankar Aiyer, a former sports minister further said that the huge amount being spent on the event could well be utilised to develop sports in this country. He could be right in a way because, with over a billion population, we have not produced a single high calibre sports person comparable to world champions except cricket. And you know the sorry, rather dirty state of affairs of our national game, Hockey! Countries smaller than 10% of India, in population and land size have consistently produced world champions in one or other sports discipline. I am not going to give a list of such small countries; there are many like Japan and Korea.
But for me, sports after all is a pass time, a matter of entertainment. Should that get priority over the quality of living of a great majority of population? I am sure, over 99% of 'sane' and intelligent people do not take this question seriously. Some of them may even dare to call me an old fool! But that is the source where we may find solution to each and every problem of this great nation.
Treat the top (the ruling class which decides what our priorities are), the masses will get cured. Any takers?
Please also see my other articles at http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Damodar_Bhandarkar
During my school days my teachers used to say 'Spend half the time in understanding the question before you attempt an answer'. Over the years I have found this principle of approaching problems is very true in real life too. Looking back at my failures, I now see it very clearly that they were simply due to lack of proper understanding of the problem rather than my ability, or lack of it, to tackle them. Most of the times I jumped into conclusions or fell victim to my prejudices and preconceived beliefs.
The case in point I would like to present in this context is the recent utterances of Congress leader Mani Shanker Aiyer, which took everybody by surprise . Congress top brass including the prime minister was rather angry at the utterances. And the media, both print and visual, made a big hue and cry of it. What did Mani say? "Personally, I will be unhappy if the Commonwealth Games are successful," said Aiyar, a nominated Rajya Sabha member. He continued, "I am very happy with the rains, firstly because it will ensure a good agriculture for the country and secondly because it will ensure that the Commonwealth Games are spoilt, if the Commonwealth Games are successful, they will further organise Asian Games and other events... I will be happy if the Games are spoilt," he said.
What nonsense is this maverick speaking? So much pains are being taken by every concerned Govt. and non- Govt. body to make the event a grand success; the works of infrastructure is going on a war footing. Is Aiyer mad or what? I am sure the general line of thinking of great many of us, "proud" Indians is going in this way. Congress Party has not only reprimanded him but also ordered him to shut up and not to talk a word about the Commonwealth Games any more. But that is not the point I am interested in. Aiyer or whoever so, the statement deserves a deeper thought before any kind of reaction.
Is it not a fact that more than 50% of the population of this great nation is struggling to get two square meals a day? A few thousand crores of rupees of tax payer's money is being spent on this event. For whose sake? For what good purpose regarding the upliftment of the society? We do not have proper health services in place leaving the rural poor simply to die or suffer. There are no sufficient primary schools to educate the rural poor. And there are no enough job opportunities for the educated middle and lower class. There are many, a long list, of problems that cry for priority attention than a sports event.
Mani Shankar Aiyer, a former sports minister further said that the huge amount being spent on the event could well be utilised to develop sports in this country. He could be right in a way because, with over a billion population, we have not produced a single high calibre sports person comparable to world champions except cricket. And you know the sorry, rather dirty state of affairs of our national game, Hockey! Countries smaller than 10% of India, in population and land size have consistently produced world champions in one or other sports discipline. I am not going to give a list of such small countries; there are many like Japan and Korea.
But for me, sports after all is a pass time, a matter of entertainment. Should that get priority over the quality of living of a great majority of population? I am sure, over 99% of 'sane' and intelligent people do not take this question seriously. Some of them may even dare to call me an old fool! But that is the source where we may find solution to each and every problem of this great nation.
Treat the top (the ruling class which decides what our priorities are), the masses will get cured. Any takers?
Please also see my other articles at http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Damodar_Bhandarkar
Friday, July 16, 2010
The Caste Pride
I met an old man at the park a few days back. I go to the park every morning and evening for my daily quota of walking. This gentleman, I had been seeing for quite some time. A short statured, fair skinned, bespectacled this man looked a reserved type to me. I too do not usually talk to strangers, but I do initiate a conversation when I see somebody regularly and if I feel the air inviting. I have quite a few such new friends, both men and women, who come to the park. But this man had never evoked any interest in me.
After taking a certain number of rounds, I sit on a stone bench to take rest for a while before beating retreat. Sometimes when all the seats are occupied, I search for a bench on which only one person is sitting. It so happened that day, I could not find a vacant bench and this gentleman was sitting alone on a bench. I went near him and asked if I may sit. He gestured to sit. A couple of moments later I asked him if he is a retired man. It was then he started to tell about himself, slow but non stop. He was a retired bank officer. His wife recently passed away. He has no own children of his own and the only adopted son, now married, having his own family to maintain has settled in Bangalore. And then he asked me what I was doing. I too told him briefly about me. The very common and most usual questions parried among old and retired people are - are you having BP? Are you a sugar patient? Have you any arthritic problems? - and about such other age related common health complaints. After all the usual queries were over, this old gentleman suddenly asked me about my caste!
I consider, since very long back, asking about one's caste is not civil. So whenever I encounter such question I used to get a bit irritated, but these days I try to humorise the situation . So I quipped - I am a non vegetarian brahmin. What caste is that he asked. I said I was born into a family which is brahmanical in all respects. He again asked, how can it be non vegetarian in that case? Very simple I said, - I, my wife and children eat non-vegetarian food! The dirty nose of the man seemed to be a bit longer and poked deeper. He asked, is that only you and your family or all of them, your type of brahmins use non vegetarian food. Well, I could feel my tolerance limit being stretched too much, and hence I ignored the question and asked him, which I never ever do, what was his caste! The man proudly said - I am a Lingayat, a Jangama!
It never stops me wondering about people still priding in their caste in this age of most advanced technology, which is still growing at such unbelievable pace. The pride of being a member of certain caste still making people indulge into heinous crimes such as murders without even a feeble streak of guilt for the sake of their sense of maintaining the honour of their cast, which they think gets diluted by inter-caste marriages. Such honor killings of young lovers by their own elders, boils my blood and shrinks my mind at such most stupid and barbaric acts in a country which prides in itself as the biggest democracy in the world! I see reports of honour killings almost once every alternate day with blood curdling stories, regularly.
Coming back to this man, Hemraju (name changed), a 65 years old childless widower living alone, cooking his own food, in all probabilities to avoid pollution of his 'most superior caste' by eating food prepared by other caste people; does he know if his family was not contaminated some ten heads back in his ancestry? Can he sure if one of his distant forefathers was childless and secretly got a male child (in these catagories female children are not taken into consideration!)from a lower caste woman? I did not ask these questions to the poor old pride, not because I am afraid but because I am far more civil capable of thinking much more beyond. Are you?
After taking a certain number of rounds, I sit on a stone bench to take rest for a while before beating retreat. Sometimes when all the seats are occupied, I search for a bench on which only one person is sitting. It so happened that day, I could not find a vacant bench and this gentleman was sitting alone on a bench. I went near him and asked if I may sit. He gestured to sit. A couple of moments later I asked him if he is a retired man. It was then he started to tell about himself, slow but non stop. He was a retired bank officer. His wife recently passed away. He has no own children of his own and the only adopted son, now married, having his own family to maintain has settled in Bangalore. And then he asked me what I was doing. I too told him briefly about me. The very common and most usual questions parried among old and retired people are - are you having BP? Are you a sugar patient? Have you any arthritic problems? - and about such other age related common health complaints. After all the usual queries were over, this old gentleman suddenly asked me about my caste!
I consider, since very long back, asking about one's caste is not civil. So whenever I encounter such question I used to get a bit irritated, but these days I try to humorise the situation . So I quipped - I am a non vegetarian brahmin. What caste is that he asked. I said I was born into a family which is brahmanical in all respects. He again asked, how can it be non vegetarian in that case? Very simple I said, - I, my wife and children eat non-vegetarian food! The dirty nose of the man seemed to be a bit longer and poked deeper. He asked, is that only you and your family or all of them, your type of brahmins use non vegetarian food. Well, I could feel my tolerance limit being stretched too much, and hence I ignored the question and asked him, which I never ever do, what was his caste! The man proudly said - I am a Lingayat, a Jangama!
It never stops me wondering about people still priding in their caste in this age of most advanced technology, which is still growing at such unbelievable pace. The pride of being a member of certain caste still making people indulge into heinous crimes such as murders without even a feeble streak of guilt for the sake of their sense of maintaining the honour of their cast, which they think gets diluted by inter-caste marriages. Such honor killings of young lovers by their own elders, boils my blood and shrinks my mind at such most stupid and barbaric acts in a country which prides in itself as the biggest democracy in the world! I see reports of honour killings almost once every alternate day with blood curdling stories, regularly.
Coming back to this man, Hemraju (name changed), a 65 years old childless widower living alone, cooking his own food, in all probabilities to avoid pollution of his 'most superior caste' by eating food prepared by other caste people; does he know if his family was not contaminated some ten heads back in his ancestry? Can he sure if one of his distant forefathers was childless and secretly got a male child (in these catagories female children are not taken into consideration!)from a lower caste woman? I did not ask these questions to the poor old pride, not because I am afraid but because I am far more civil capable of thinking much more beyond. Are you?
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Depression - A Temporary State Of Mind
I was truly shocked to read a news column today. An actor couple committed suicide!
The couple, husband 40 and wife 38 were both Kannada actors, having acted in movies and TV serials as well. They were into production too. Recently the wife returned from America having quite a few promises from her NRI friends to enter into production. There was a photo of the couple alongside the news. They look fairly beautiful, sort of made for each other. The couple was childless; both have living parents. Husband hails from Davangere and wife from Hassan. The sad part in fact is, according to the news both husband and wife were qualified Engineers doing well in software firms and opted for acting career rejecting the IT jobs for which practically a great majority of present day youth crave for. Yes, as the paper reports, both of them had indulged in too many things at a time and were in a sort of financial problems. Well, a senior actress says, they could have opted to to go back to IT field instead of taking the extreme step.
The point I want to discuss here is about the temporary state of mind that leads to commit suicide.
I have come across quite some cases of suicide, both successful and attempted. I know of at least two cases of repeated attempts. I have known people hanging themselves for reasons which look flimsy to you and me. A middle class person commits suicide because his daughter's rich father- in - law insults him in front of the gathering during the marriage. A bank manager hangs himself for having reprimanded by his superiors for not being able to recover the loan he had sanctioned to a customer of his branch though it was in 10970's. And the instances of suicide by failed lovers are ample from time immemorial.
I said it is a temporary state of mind. Well, all states of mind are temporary. Recollect all the happinesses you had in the past. All of them are temporary, because the very next moment when that moment of happiness passes, the happiness you had instantly turns into a piece of memory; you can never be in that state of happiness again. So is the mind about everything it undergoes and undertakes - a huge storehouse of me. Also no sad moment repeats itself except as memory. And the funny thing about this mind is, why do you feel sad again just by recollecting the memory of sadness? I am sure this is not the experience limited to me only that no recollection of memory of happiness ever brings back happiness! Why? Ego! Ego is 'me'. Ego is pride. Ego is hurt. Ego is insult. Ego is success. Ego is virtue. You see? All these values make for your ego which is akin to sorrow, not happiness. And this Ego is mind itself; not a separate entity. A created entity, that mind calls 'me', which is ego. Every sense, every value, every moment of life is ego-centric. Without ego there is no happiness, no sorrow, because the sense of these states creates ego, me. Therefore, the hurt also is directly proportionate to your sense of value. As I had said earlier in this write up, many a time the reason for suicide looks flimsy from outside the person who commits suicide. The value of money, sense of shame, degradation of pride, sense of achievement and all those attributes of the mind differ from person to person. So the gravity of the situation formed by the calibre of these attributes of the mind often pushes a person to commit suicide. If the mind survives the brief moment of peak acuteness of the urge to die, the same mind later regrets or even laughs at itself for having thought of dying a moment earlier!
I don't think there is anybody in this world who has not thought of committing suicide at least once in lifetime. Even a trained counselor is not free from this temporary state of mind. Life is, but in understanding this nature of the mind which never stays in one state, one place, one bit of value for long. A person arguing vigorously for the benefits of nonvegetarianism may suddenly turn into vegetarianism. Prince Siddhartha became The Buddha due to a momentary state of mind seeing the created pleasures of wealth. He too was not free from other states such as rivalry. Mahavir Jain was his rival! (Read Osho) Mahavir was very old and was having acute old age sufferings and Buddha was a young sensation of divinity. Even then, today it is Buddha's teachings that rule the roost of most modern spiritual thinking. Aristotle was firm in his belief that women have less number of teeth! UG once said, "The difference between me and the psychiatrist is that I give expression to my thoughts; he doesn't! ... "
If one realises this fact about the mind being temporary every moment it thinks, no thought of suicide succeeds. Sure, the thought comes, maybe again and again and in some people yet again, but the awareness of this fact of the mind being temporary,- yes I said mind, not thought, - because it is the thought that creates mind! So the mind itself is an illusion!!! Why should one allow it to rule life?
The couple, husband 40 and wife 38 were both Kannada actors, having acted in movies and TV serials as well. They were into production too. Recently the wife returned from America having quite a few promises from her NRI friends to enter into production. There was a photo of the couple alongside the news. They look fairly beautiful, sort of made for each other. The couple was childless; both have living parents. Husband hails from Davangere and wife from Hassan. The sad part in fact is, according to the news both husband and wife were qualified Engineers doing well in software firms and opted for acting career rejecting the IT jobs for which practically a great majority of present day youth crave for. Yes, as the paper reports, both of them had indulged in too many things at a time and were in a sort of financial problems. Well, a senior actress says, they could have opted to to go back to IT field instead of taking the extreme step.
The point I want to discuss here is about the temporary state of mind that leads to commit suicide.
I have come across quite some cases of suicide, both successful and attempted. I know of at least two cases of repeated attempts. I have known people hanging themselves for reasons which look flimsy to you and me. A middle class person commits suicide because his daughter's rich father- in - law insults him in front of the gathering during the marriage. A bank manager hangs himself for having reprimanded by his superiors for not being able to recover the loan he had sanctioned to a customer of his branch though it was in 10970's. And the instances of suicide by failed lovers are ample from time immemorial.
I said it is a temporary state of mind. Well, all states of mind are temporary. Recollect all the happinesses you had in the past. All of them are temporary, because the very next moment when that moment of happiness passes, the happiness you had instantly turns into a piece of memory; you can never be in that state of happiness again. So is the mind about everything it undergoes and undertakes - a huge storehouse of me. Also no sad moment repeats itself except as memory. And the funny thing about this mind is, why do you feel sad again just by recollecting the memory of sadness? I am sure this is not the experience limited to me only that no recollection of memory of happiness ever brings back happiness! Why? Ego! Ego is 'me'. Ego is pride. Ego is hurt. Ego is insult. Ego is success. Ego is virtue. You see? All these values make for your ego which is akin to sorrow, not happiness. And this Ego is mind itself; not a separate entity. A created entity, that mind calls 'me', which is ego. Every sense, every value, every moment of life is ego-centric. Without ego there is no happiness, no sorrow, because the sense of these states creates ego, me. Therefore, the hurt also is directly proportionate to your sense of value. As I had said earlier in this write up, many a time the reason for suicide looks flimsy from outside the person who commits suicide. The value of money, sense of shame, degradation of pride, sense of achievement and all those attributes of the mind differ from person to person. So the gravity of the situation formed by the calibre of these attributes of the mind often pushes a person to commit suicide. If the mind survives the brief moment of peak acuteness of the urge to die, the same mind later regrets or even laughs at itself for having thought of dying a moment earlier!
I don't think there is anybody in this world who has not thought of committing suicide at least once in lifetime. Even a trained counselor is not free from this temporary state of mind. Life is, but in understanding this nature of the mind which never stays in one state, one place, one bit of value for long. A person arguing vigorously for the benefits of nonvegetarianism may suddenly turn into vegetarianism. Prince Siddhartha became The Buddha due to a momentary state of mind seeing the created pleasures of wealth. He too was not free from other states such as rivalry. Mahavir Jain was his rival! (Read Osho) Mahavir was very old and was having acute old age sufferings and Buddha was a young sensation of divinity. Even then, today it is Buddha's teachings that rule the roost of most modern spiritual thinking. Aristotle was firm in his belief that women have less number of teeth! UG once said, "The difference between me and the psychiatrist is that I give expression to my thoughts; he doesn't! ... "
If one realises this fact about the mind being temporary every moment it thinks, no thought of suicide succeeds. Sure, the thought comes, maybe again and again and in some people yet again, but the awareness of this fact of the mind being temporary,- yes I said mind, not thought, - because it is the thought that creates mind! So the mind itself is an illusion!!! Why should one allow it to rule life?
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Etiquette, Courtesy, Custom and Hypocrisy
It has become a habit now since over a year. After returning from my evening walk, I straight away go to the fridge, take out a lime (I see to it that it is always there!), prepare sherbet (nimbu pani) pour in two glasses, give one to my old girl, take a big gulp from mine, top up and go to take a shower. The habit gave much relief in peak summer. And to stand under cold shower was bliss!
The monsoon was in time this year. For over a week it poured heavyly. Akin to this part of the land, the temperature comes down rapidly after a good spell of monsoon showers, demanding warm blankets at night. But my habit of guzzling sherbet continued.
Today there was this neighbor woman at home discussing something with my old companion, who signaled me to make more sherbet. I did and offered a glass to the young woman. After sipping, this woman complimented me that my sherbet was good, having all the ingredients in right proportion. I thanked her and jokingly asked her to come everyday at the same time and have a glass! Her compliment was genuine.
From the way people compliment you for anything you do for them, you will come to know if that comes from the heart or just routine etiquette. There are people who possess all the skills to make you oblige but they simply vanish without a word of gratitude the moment they got their job done. You feel bad. Contrast this with those who thank you just as a civil custom without giving a damn to feel it. You feel worse. There are some other people yet, who take your good nature to help others in their need as your weakness and laugh behind your back despite having regular help from you. They simply take you for granted. Their facade is so wonderful, you don't ever feel you are being taken for a long ride. I pity you!
For those of you, young and energetic at the threshold of your life in a new job, raring to impress your boss, enthusiastic to build a career, lasting as well as satisfactory, learn to see the fine line between a hearty compliment and hypocrisy. This line is seldom visible and I am not telling you to look for this line when people compliment you but when you compliment people. If you are not able to feel gratitude at the bottom of your heart, I am afraid you have to depend on other devious methods for your success which will not take you far. Simply don't feel obliged if you cannot bring it out from the bottom; just smile. Also, there is peril in overdoing it - your complimenting, your way of showing your gratitude. It is like a tight rope walk which you certainly can do if you are keen to observe yourself.
Many management Gurus teach you to be thankful to others and also how to thank, perhaps profusely. They say it is an art, a very good art, which pays you back in truck loads. See?.. it is an art! It is not. It is virtue. Understand the difference. And virtue cannot be taught, learnt and cultivated. You cannot buy a virtue. You cannot practice a virtue. Yes, thanking somebody for the little or big help they gave you, is virtue. The question of civil attitude, culture, courtesy or custom comes next. It is a virtue first and exists in every born human being. The only way to bring it out is to observe yourself. Without this observation of your own mind - how it feels when being helped by others - thanking becomes either mechanical at best or hypocrisy at worst.
Learn to feel the vibrant bottom of your heart. Success follows.
(please have a look at my other articles at http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Damodar_Bhandarkar)
The monsoon was in time this year. For over a week it poured heavyly. Akin to this part of the land, the temperature comes down rapidly after a good spell of monsoon showers, demanding warm blankets at night. But my habit of guzzling sherbet continued.
Today there was this neighbor woman at home discussing something with my old companion, who signaled me to make more sherbet. I did and offered a glass to the young woman. After sipping, this woman complimented me that my sherbet was good, having all the ingredients in right proportion. I thanked her and jokingly asked her to come everyday at the same time and have a glass! Her compliment was genuine.
From the way people compliment you for anything you do for them, you will come to know if that comes from the heart or just routine etiquette. There are people who possess all the skills to make you oblige but they simply vanish without a word of gratitude the moment they got their job done. You feel bad. Contrast this with those who thank you just as a civil custom without giving a damn to feel it. You feel worse. There are some other people yet, who take your good nature to help others in their need as your weakness and laugh behind your back despite having regular help from you. They simply take you for granted. Their facade is so wonderful, you don't ever feel you are being taken for a long ride. I pity you!
For those of you, young and energetic at the threshold of your life in a new job, raring to impress your boss, enthusiastic to build a career, lasting as well as satisfactory, learn to see the fine line between a hearty compliment and hypocrisy. This line is seldom visible and I am not telling you to look for this line when people compliment you but when you compliment people. If you are not able to feel gratitude at the bottom of your heart, I am afraid you have to depend on other devious methods for your success which will not take you far. Simply don't feel obliged if you cannot bring it out from the bottom; just smile. Also, there is peril in overdoing it - your complimenting, your way of showing your gratitude. It is like a tight rope walk which you certainly can do if you are keen to observe yourself.
Many management Gurus teach you to be thankful to others and also how to thank, perhaps profusely. They say it is an art, a very good art, which pays you back in truck loads. See?.. it is an art! It is not. It is virtue. Understand the difference. And virtue cannot be taught, learnt and cultivated. You cannot buy a virtue. You cannot practice a virtue. Yes, thanking somebody for the little or big help they gave you, is virtue. The question of civil attitude, culture, courtesy or custom comes next. It is a virtue first and exists in every born human being. The only way to bring it out is to observe yourself. Without this observation of your own mind - how it feels when being helped by others - thanking becomes either mechanical at best or hypocrisy at worst.
Learn to feel the vibrant bottom of your heart. Success follows.
(please have a look at my other articles at http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Damodar_Bhandarkar)
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